THIS IS IT: take it or leave it

I was on phone with one of my bestest of friends the other day I talked to her about this blog, what I started it out wanting it to be and how far I thought I was from the plan. I was a bit frustrated with this, I wasn’t where I wanted to be faith wise yet the blogs tagline is “A young woman’s walk of faith through musings,poetry and testimonies.”The faith part seemed rusty really really rusty. I did not think I was living by faith but more of by sight. So I told her about how I wanted to take a break from blogging, give it a rest until I got this faith thing going straight. When I was done, I waited for a response, Honestly I just wanted her to agree with me, that is what friends are for right? No? OK. Saul Bellow says “when we ask for advice, we are usually looking for an accomplice.” and in this case he wasn’t far from the truth.

She did not tell me what I wanted to hear, instead she told me something like, ” If you are looking for something else, you wont find it, THIS IS IT!” That conversation ended somehow none profoundly. The magnitude of what she had told me did not sink in until an hour later. I was walking in town, high heeled, short dress feeling really good about myself, then it hit me, “THIS IS IT”. The walk of faith has it’s good and ugly and doubts and fears, moments of utter disbelief and those of mountain moving magnitude, ups and downs but its still a walk if you keep putting one foot in front of the other regardless of the pace. I am still walking, I believe in Jesus, I desire to be like him every day granted some days more than others but I am walking. When walking we  are bound to stumble, fall, get hurt, see beautiful things along the way, grow weary, tired.

THIS IS IT!!! This is my current walk and when I put down that tagline “A young woman’s walk of faith through musings,poetry and testimonies.” I thought it would be a continuous glorious walk of victory and prophesy, speaking in tongues even. But it hasn’t been, instead it has been one of a daily reliance of grace undeserved, mercy undeserved, favours undeserved and life undeserved.  And though this is my current IT, this is not the end. In order to use a map correctly you need to know your current location. So this IT right here is my current location, but I know where I want to go.

I will keep blogging, I will share the victories and the losses. It sucks to be vulnerable but someone has to be. 

Walk with me, will you?

Song for the post, please check out this song by needtobreathe they are my current artists on replay.



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